We’ve all been there, where we feel like we are failing as a parent, I tend to feel like this especially when I am not feeling 100% myself. I am the parent who is constantly worrying about my kids. I want to be in constant control of everything they are doing. I am what you call a helicopter mom and that is not what I want to be. I had to do something because I was making myself crazy.
I had to force myself to learn what I could control and what I couldn’t control. With my oldest son I can control what he eats when he is at my house. When he is with his dad and the same with his bed time and what the house rules are.
I had to learn the difference between fear and fact. Was I scared that he was being bullied or did I have actual proof by what he was telling me, a change in attitude, and grades? What am I being so crazy anxious about? I need to actually sit down and start having conversations with my son, talk to him about his day. I need to get the details not a “good, we had gym class, or we had chicken nuggets for lunch”. I need to build that relationship now while he is young so I can continue with it through his teenage years when it’s even more important.
Focus on yourself. Wait what? I have kids, how can I focus on myself? Well to be in good mental and physical health you need to take some time for yourself every day, even if it’s just 5-10 minutes. Even if I hide in my closet to eat that candy bar I don’t want to share.
We need to stay in present time. When we are thinking about the future and the “what ifs” we are missing out on something that is happening currently. If we aren’t in the present because let’s be honest kids are sneaky. Since I struggle with my anxiety and depression there will be times I do struggle but I don’t the luxury of staying in bed because my kids do need me. Elijah is usually smacking me in the anywhere between 6 and 7am telling me to get up and go downstairs. During those times where I struggle Elijah may get more screen time, or gets to play with some of his brothers toys and Lego’s. Eli has always been pretty good at playing alone.
Remember you are not alone. We all have different parenting styles we all have the same end goal and that is to raise our kids to be great human beings. We may have ups and downs along the way but we will all get there in the end. ❤
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to this picture. I am not a medical professional, if you are having a medical emergency please contact 911 immediately. This post is for informational purposes only. If you believe you have a medical issue contact your local medical provider.