Learning how we accept and express love is so important whether you are single, in a relationship or married. Most people have heard of the book “5 love languages” by Dr. Gary Chapman. This is where I first learned about love languages. There are 5 different love languages that you can fit your personality. Those 5 love languages are: receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service or physical touch. I didn’t know my love language for a long time but with doing research and reading his book I have learned how I love and how I accept love from others.
Receiving gifts- This could be one the easiest love languages to learn. Receiving a gift is something that you could hold and look at and know that your loved one is thinking of you. A gift is a symbol of that love.
Quality time- This can be a little more difficult especially depending on your schedules, kids and many other factors in your life. Quality time means turning off the TV, your phones and any other distractions. Sit down face-to-face and having your attention strictly on your loved one.
Words of affirmation- Someone who’s love language is words includes verbal compliments or appreciation. This love language is something very simple that can be done throughout the day.
Acts of service- This includes doing a task or something your loved one would have otherwise done yourself. Actions speak louder than words.
Physical touch- this love language includes holding hands, hugging, kissing or sexual intercourse. Someone may feel unloved without this. This love language can be hard. Especially if you are someone who likes and craves that physical touch.
I have broke down which love language I am or am not. I am probably the farthest away
from the love language physical touch. I am not someone who is a touchy person. I grew up in a family that didn’t use physical touch as a way of affection. I am also not someone who looks to words to make me feel loved. I actually don’t take compliments well because of the way I look at myself. I am also not good at quality time. A lot of that has to do with my mind is always going 100 mph and always find things that need to be done around the house. I am not good at just sitting down and talking.
My love language is definitely acts of service. The best way for me to receive love is having something done for me that I otherwise was going to do myself. So being surprised by the everyday things being done is what makes me the happiest. It could be something as small as taking out the trash or cooking dinner. It doesn’t take much to make me feel loved. My second love language would be receiving gifts. Who doesn’t love getting a gift. It could be something as small as picking wild flowers or receiving a heartfelt card. I don’t need or expect my loved one to spoil me with gifts. It’s the little things in life that make me feel loved and happy.
When it comes to Dalton’s love language, in my opinion, is physical touch. He is someone who loves to hold hands, be kissed or hugged. This is something that has always been difficult for me to do as a way to express my love for him. I am someone who only likes to be touched when I want to be touched. This has been a struggle for me because I want to be able to speak his love language. So I do my best. But its something that I have to remind daily that it’s the way he accepts love.
What is your love language? What about your loved one? Do you speak his or her love language? Being with someone you love is about commitment and sacrifices so even if you don’t speak the same love language doesn’t mean that you can’t. I don’t speak the same love language as Dalton but I try and will continue to try for him. ❤